Cry it out?

I never knew sleep would be the aspect of parenthood that I worry about the most. Ben actually slept well at night as a newborn, but starting at about 5 months, he started waking every two hours, and it has gotten progressively worse. Lately he's been waking up every half hour. Part of it is that we've trained him wrong (he wakes for the comfort of nursing, which I give him), but part of it seems like some kind of restless body thing or nightmares that wakes him.

Many times he's gone to bed very well, by himself, so I think we were encouraged by that and thought there was hope without resorting to Cry It Out. I understand the not being able to go back to sleep without nursing, but I don't understand why he is waking so often to begin with. Two weeks ago he started sitting up and standing up in his sleep, and waking himself up, and I understand that happens, like their muscles are just on autopilot, practicing their new skills. But he was waking before he was doing that. I hope the sitting up is a phase and goes away soon. We've been totally fed up about 3 times and let him cry it out for 30 minutes one night (he fell asleep after 30 min), 85 minutes one night (he was was hoarse for a week after that, and I was ABSOLUTELY MISERABLE doing it), and 15 minutes several times before going in to him. Then, I would read something that made me think cry it out was so damaging and get myself all confused again. So, it's all my fault, really, for not deciding how to treat him and not being consistent.

Tim slept in the garage for a few nights to get rest before the Denver marathon (10/14). Then, that night, after his marathon, he commandeered the night time, wouldn't let me near Ben and stayed up all night with him. He cried for 3 hours straight, slept for half an hour and then cried for 3 more hours, most of the time pretty hysterical. I was pretty much crying too, all night long. Your baby's cry makes every nerve ending in your whole body hurt!! I was in such a bad mood Monday, and felt like a horrible parent. Tuesday night he cried a little less and apparently learned to be put back to sleep by Daddy, Wednesday night he woke up only 4 times, and then last night he had a bad night again. It seemed like we were moving in the right direction, but he got worse Friday and Saturday night. You would think he would stop waking if he doesn't get to nurse, but he continued to wake even more often than every half hour and Tim was at his wit's end. All the Cry It Out books say the problem should be solved well within a week. We gave it a week and all we accomplished was breaking the nursing to sleep habit a little bit.

So we gave up and I'll just continue getting up with him, or bring him to bed in the middle of the night. Poor sleepless Ben.